Against All Odds: Turning Autistic Pain Into Power

When people think of Anaheim, California, they picture Disneyland—the “Happiest Place on Earth.” But for me, growing up in Anaheim meant a very different reality. I lived on the other side of the tracks, where gangs, crime, and danger were everyday experiences. Life was tough, and as a mixed-race Mexican, Irish, and German girl raised in poverty, the challenges were multiplied.

Still, amidst the struggle, I found moments of joy. Some of my fondest childhood memories come from our trips to Tijuana. In Tijuana, our family could afford meals out, stay in hotels, and shop for treasures we could never afford back home. Those trips were a treat, a rare chance to feel abundant and carefree in a life that often felt anything but.

Autism: A Hidden Advantage

Life as an autistic child in such an environment added another layer of complexity. However, in many ways, my autism turned out to be one of my greatest assets. My intense focus and love for learning became my lifeline. While some of my peers were drawn into dangerous paths, I found solace and purpose in the library. Books became my escape, my obsession, and my tool for survival. Little did I know that my academic fervor would steer me away from the fates of some of my friends—prison or worse.

Martial Arts: A Strategy for Survival

Being different made me a target for bullies. After being bullied one too many times, I turned to my uncle, a black belt, and asked him to teach me karate. That decision changed everything. At just 5 feet tall and 90 pounds, I became a force to be reckoned with. Martial arts became my special interest, and my dedication transformed my body into a swift, powerful machine.

From that point on, I won 99% of my fights, and people stopped messing with me. More importantly, martial arts gave me the confidence and skills to protect myself. It’s proof that even tiny people can do incredible things when armed with the right tools and mindset.

The Bullying Epidemic for Neurodivergent Kids

As a therapist, I’ve seen countless neurodivergent kids who face relentless bullying. Some are followed home daily simply for being “weird,” “strange,” or “odd.” This constant targeting sticks out like a sore thumb, leaving kids vulnerable to trauma and, eventually, complex PTSD.

Parents, if you’re reading this, PLEASE SAVE YOUR CHILD. Bullies often don’t stop unless someone intervenes. As a trauma specialist, I’ve worked with countless neurodivergent individuals who carry deep scars from being bullied as children. One of the most painful things I hear is when these kids ran to their parents for help, only to be told: “What are you doing to attract the bully?” or “Just tell someone.”

Your child needs to know you have their back. They need to know you will go to bat for them. Whether it means speaking with the principal, confronting the bully’s parents, or even removing them from the school—do whatever it takes. Your child is worth the help and support. Bullying won’t stop if they feel alone.

Public Schools Need More Support

Our public schools need urgent help when it comes to educating teachers and students about bullying and how to navigate it. Neurodivergent children, in particular, face higher risks of being targeted. Schools must provide:

• Anti-bullying programs that focus on inclusion and empathy.

• Teacher training to recognize and intervene in bullying situations.

• Safe spaces where neurodivergent kids can decompress and feel supported.

• Required therapy for bullies. Many bullies are suffering themselves and take out their pain on others. Identifying these kids and getting them into therapy could change their lives—and the lives of those they torment. Schools should fund therapy for children whose families cannot afford it. This investment could save countless children from trauma.

As Tupac Shakur once said, “I’m not saying I’m going to change the world, but I guarantee that I will spark the brain that will change the world.” Let’s spark that change by giving every child—bullied or bully—the support they need.

Homeschooling as a Rebel Mom

As a mother, I’ve chosen to homeschool my neurodivergent children. I’ve seen firsthand how neurodivergent kids become targets in public schools. Beyond bullying, I’ve always been a rebel at heart, and I don’t want my kids to be followers in a broken system. Homeschooling allows me to protect them and nurture their unique strengths in a way the traditional system cannot.

Helping Autistic Kids Thrive

Bullying is more common for neurodivergent children, and it’s our responsibility as parents, educators, and community members to equip them with tools to navigate this reality. These tools might include:

• Teaching self-defense techniques to boost confidence and safety.

• Building resilience through emotional and social support.

• Educating peers about neurodivergence to reduce stigma.

• Advocating for systemic changes in schools to create safer environments for all children.

• Providing accessible therapy for all children involved in bullying—because both the bullied and the bullies need help to break the cycle.

As Maya Angelou said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Now that we know the stakes, let’s do better for our kids.

Turning Struggles Into Strength

Growing up poor, autistic, and in a dangerous environment wasn’t easy. But those challenges shaped who I am today. My autism gave me the focus to excel in academics and martial arts, saving me from paths of destruction. It’s also given me the passion to help others—to teach parents and children how to navigate the hardships of bullying and to create a world where neurodivergent kids can thrive.

If you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver, take a moment to think about how you can empower the neurodivergent children in your life. TOGETHER, WE CAN GIVE THEM THE TOOLS TO TURN THEIR STRUGGLES INTO STRENGTHS.

As Malcolm X said, “Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.” Let’s prepare our kids for a better, safer tomorrow—starting now.
If you’re ready to make a difference for neurodivergent children or need guidance on navigating these challenges, reach out to me for personalized strategies and expert support. Together, we can empower every child to turn their struggles into strengths.